The Great Feud

Star of big and small screen vs. Boston house-cat. Go!

I started a Twitter feud between Rainn Wilson, star on NBC's The Office, and a house-cat in Boston.

I intentionally tried to set up a bit of a rivalry between the two. This may be the most-recognised accomplishment of my lifetime so far.

  1. Rainn Wilson I'm #37 In followers and someday I hope to surpass MC Hammer. & I might be over-reaching, but I've got Ol' Wil Wheaton in my sights
  2. Me @rainnwilson you should probably know that @sockington is your real competition. But I think you and @pennycat can take him down together.
  3. Penny PENNY'S POSSE! PLEASE, EVERYONE FOLLOW @RAINNWILSON! He's in @sockington's sights and we can't let doofus pass him!
  4. Rainn Wilson @sockington booooooo!
  5. Rainn Wilson @sockington I'm gonna put yr carcass in the freezer. Meee-yowzah!
  6. Socks @rainnwilson HOORAY nice beet farmer is putting me in food storage with tasty carcass PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Never let it be said that I didn't try to prevent Socks' murder.

  1. Me @pennycat it appears @sockington is in @rainnwilson's fridge. I know he annoys you sometimes, but I think you might want to stop his murder.

Penny was against the idea, but for all the wrong reasons, and I realized I had misread, and was mistaken about the gravity of the situation.

  1. Penny @rainnwilson I hear you want to put my roomie @sockington in a freezer. DON'T DO IT! He'll get another 100K "sympathy" followers.
  2. Me @sockington you need to learn your tenses. I thought you were actually in the freezer!

A little (a lot, actually) later, Rainn decided to inform his many new followers about Socks' existence by way of another threat of freezing. Socks was flattered.

  1. Rainn Do you guys know @sockington ? It's a cat. A fu**ing cat that tweets. Bullsh**. Sockington, I've got a freezer with your name on it.
  2. Socks zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz pleasant @rainnwilson being nice and giving me a treat while resting in lap zzzzzzzzzzz WHU HUH OH ONLY A DREAM oh well
  3. Penny @rainnwilson Instead of a freezer for @Sockington, I suggest a scandal that makes him lose all his followers--they go to us instead.
  4. Rainn FRAUD! There's no way this friggin cat could type this while going to sleep! RT @sockington hopping onto empty bed SCORE mine mine mi- zzzz
  5. Rainn RT @sockington zzzz @rainnwilson being nice and giving me a treat WHile resting in lap zzzz WHU OH ONLY A DREAM -SUCKINGTON, Listen up...

Then it got really ugly. Socks' owner was not amused. Penny was no longer on the same team. And those are the worst type of acid pellets!

  1. Rainn Suckington, I'm going to put a roadside flare in your little mouth,light it, charbroil you and then feed you to your owner, Jason Scott
  2. Jason Scott @EricMueller Yeah, I think we can safely say this is the last time the grey gentleman will be taking the bait. Violent threats cross a line.
  3. Penny @rainnwilson Why are you so hostile towards @Sockington? You don't have to live with him. I do. Q.E.D.: Shut your pie hole.
  4. Rainn Meow, meow, purrr. I need to lick my fur now. Its crusted with the tears of all the children who actually thought I was a real tweeting cat.
  5. Rainn @suckington That was not me that replaced your kitty litter with radioactive acid pellets. Just sayin'

Then it gets weird. I think Rainn might be grumpy.

  1. Rainn For the record, I made a nickname for @sockington which was co-opted by feline imposter @suckington. @Sockington is the devil incarnate.
  2. Rainn @suckington is a bigger fraud than that douche @sockington - if such a thing is possible. WWW.FelineFreeInternet.com. Join me in my cause.
  3. Rainn @sockington You know that cat-nip filled mouse sock you like to play with? I laced it with distemper filled rat phlegm. Meow.

Suckington has an acute observation which I think deserves further examination. Rainn has gone off the deep end.

  1. Suckington Meow. Meow wondering if @sockington is @rainnwilson's love kitten.
  2. Rainn @common_squirrel can you please track down @sockington and eat his eyes out?